blackheisei

We stood outside, some distance away from the hut as I explained what I had heard. Predictably, she immediately wanted to go back in. “I didn’t hear anything, I wanna check it out!”

“Well, *you* can go into the creepy haunted murder hut that hates me, but you will do it alone. No way in hell am I going back in there.” I eyed her as I went on sternly, “You realize, this is the most basic Stupid Horror Movie decision. This is how side characters die.” Talking about how we would die if our lives were a movie was a long running joke between us, but this was the first time it felt unfunny. It was the first time it felt real.

“Fuck you, I’m a main character!” She laughed, flicking me off as she walked back towards the hut. To her credit, she didn’t charge right back inside. I trailed behind her as she checked the woods surrounding the hut, making sure there was no one there. “Besides, maybe the reason there’s no bugs is because someone really does live here. Maybe there’s a basement or an attic we didn’t notice, and a hobo lives in there.”

Exterior cleared, she went back inside. I watched from the doorway and tried not to wig out. I wasn’t going to go in, but I also wasn’t ashamed to admit I didn’t want her out of my sight. She poked around a bit more, checking the ceiling and every corner for some hint. “Maybe you heard a park ranger? You said it was pretty quiet, there was that chain on the door. You must have heard someone outside. I must not have noticed, because I was focused on taking pictures.”

That’s the thing about Claire; she loves to watch horror movies, loves to play horror games…but she has never believed in anything supernatural. She has always been the world’s most skeptical skeptic. She could tell I was genuinely upset, so she believed I had heard something, but she had decided it was someone hiding from us, or someone in the woods who had seen us.

“Hey, Claire?” I said nervously.

“What? Did you hear something again?” She glanced furiously around the room.

“No...but look at your dirt doodle.” The last panel of her little window comic had been replaced by what looked like a handprint. She had drawn the thing on the inside of the window. There was no earthly way that someone could have wiped it away without one of us noticing.

“What the hell? Did you do that?” she asked, I could tell she was starting to doubt that I wasn’t playing a prank on her.

“YES.” It was the same voice as before. I was legitimately freaking out.

This time, Claire actually seemed to hear it, startling and glancing around. “Did you hear that? I didn’t catch what it said.”

“It said, ‘yes’. As in, ‘yes, the same thing that is making the creepy sounds is making handprints from inside the hut’. As in, ‘yes, it is time to get the hell out of here’.” It was a little surprising to me how normal my voice sounded as I went on, “Also, I suddenly feel the need to remind you that my hearing aids have *directional* microphones, so the only way I should be hearing anything is if it is *in front of me*. Where you are. In the hut. I think I want to go home now.”

Thankfully, it was weird enough that Claire agreed. We hightailed it out of there and kept going until we found the trail back to the car. I could tell that breathlessness from running was the only thing keeping her from laughing, but I personally was glad of the time to process. It was a hell of a lot to process.

“Dude, that was awesome!” was her first comment when we were both able to breathe again. “I have no idea what that was, but it was freaky cool.”

“A little more freaky than cool, as far as I’m concerned. That was… I don’t know what that was. I don’t know how I feel about it. I don’t know a lot of things, suddenly.” It’s not every day your understanding of the world around you is so radically shaken.

“But, hey,” Claire joked, “At least we know your hearing aids work well!”

“Yeah, maybe a little too well. I would ask my audiologist, but I feel like this is not what he meant when he said I would probably hear better than I ever have in my life.” I huffed a laugh, “Think I should ask to turn them down?”

“What? No! That was awesome! I just wish I could have heard the same stuff. Then we could figure out what you were hearing.”

“What, ‘my hearing aids give me the power to hear ghosts’ isn’t a satisfactory answer to you?” I couldn’t even tell if I was joking anymore.

“Yeah...fuck that. Lets get home. I want to do some research”

So that’s what we did.

If you were to talk to my family, or any of my friends, ‘great listener’ is not in my skill set. If you asked me if I could speak with the ‘dead’, I would assume you had meant ‘deaf’, and answer that yes, I do know some sign language. I learned when I started losing my hearing in my early twenties.

So with that said, you can imagine how startling it was when I first realized that I could hear spirits.

Now, this is by no means a skill I was born with. As far as I can tell, it’s all thanks to my digital hearing aids. I got them after a few years of waffling about whether or not I needed them, when I finally got sick of asking people, “No, say it again, I still didn’t hear you.”

Well, they work. Turns out that by their electronic nature, I can use them to hear EVP.

(if this was a tv show, I know that this is the part where the camera would cut to Lead Investigator Guy. He would then calmly explain how EVP stands for Electronic Voice Phenomena; which is when a voice or sound shows up in a recording, but the natural human ear can’t pick up on it. Have I seen a few too many ghost hunting shows? Hell yeah! It’s what finally helped me realize I wasn’t crazy.)

The first time I heard something weird was when my partner Claire and I were hiking at a state park not too far from our house. We had been walking for a while, and hadn’t seen any trail markers recently. I’m honestly not sure if we were even still in the park when we found an old concrete hut out in the woods near a stream. I don’t know if it was an old mill house, or someone’s home, or what. It was creepy, though, and Claire loves horror movies, so nothing would do but for us to go in.

The place was small, what looked like a single room, with a rusted metal door and a dusty metal table shoved against one wall. The door had been chained shut, but long enough ago that the lock was broken. It was as dirty, musty, and moss covered as I had expected, with broken tile and bits of concrete strewn across the floor. “There’s no spider webs, at least. It’s actually weird how few bugs are in here.” I remarked as we wandered around.

“You’re right, Lily, this is way too clean. What kind of self respecting ax murder sweeps the floor this well!” Claire said with a wry grin as she wiped a grimy hand on her pants. One of the filthier windows had been turned into a 4 panel stick figure comic, detailing the grisly end to a pair of either women or men carrying melons. As dirt doodles went, it wasn’t her best.

We poked around a bit more, me taking pictures of the contrast between the rust and the moss, her drawing creepy faces in the dust. Then the sun hit a window just right, and then it was her taking pictures of the sunbeams, and me crouching and taking pictures of her ‘art’.

Eventually, I stood and asked, “Well, what should we do now?”

“Get out of here.” Was the whispered answer.

“Well, yeah, that part was obvious.” I was a bit irritated, honestly. Even with the hearing aids, whispers with your back to me is the worst way for me to hear anything, and Claire knows that.

“What?” Claire turned to look at me, obviously distracted by reviewing the photos she had been taking.

“You said, ‘Get out of here’. That’s obvious. What do you want to do after that?” I asked, a bit pointed.

By now, Claire was eyeing me sidelong. It was her, ‘I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, but you’re amusing’ look. I got that one a lot. “I didn’t say anything. What did you think I said?”

“Get. Out. NOW.” No longer a faint whisper. It was clear, close, and really fucking creepy.

I could feel my eyes getting wider and wider as I stared at Claire’s face. Her mouth wasn’t moving. She wasn’t responding to the terrifying voice in the same room.

“NOPE! Fuck this. Fuck this truly,” I said as I marched out of that hut as fast as I could without tripping on a rock or breaking my ankle. Claire chased after me, demanding to know what was wrong.

She didn’t like my answer.

Current Mood: pleased

My cat, Seren, has developed a sophisticated system of property damage to communicate in lieu of meowing.

(He is able to meow, and does it frequently with my moirail when I am out of the house, but for some reason, has decided that actions speak louder than words, when it comes to me. If I am in the house, he only "mirps" while jumping onto things. Moirail had to film him meowing, as I didn't believe her.)

The fact that I understand these actions, probably doesn't help convince him otherwise.

1) sitting on the bathroom sink = "My water bowl is empty"

2) banging on the door of the bedroom= "let me out"

3) scratching on the carpet in the middle of the room= "You better fukkin clean my litter box NOW or I will revenge poop right here"

4) banging on the mirror= "My food bowl is empty"

5)lurking at the head of the bed, breathing heavily in my ear as I sleep= "I want under the covers with you"

Current Mood: amused

Holy shit, has it really been 8 years since I posted regularly on this thing? This whole blog feels like a time capsule for the melodramatic brain of 20 something Heisei, and YIKES.

Still, it's strange to be back poking at it after so many years.

I guess we'll see if this old coat still fits.

Current Mood: nostalgic

I'm trying to avoid spoilers here, but... the end boss' first form. I was amused by the *ostentatiousness* of his armour... but then he pulled out his huge, red, throbbing...sword.

And he keeps holding it at crotch-level. With the camera viewing the strangely shaped sword at awkward angles.

Was that porn or a boss battle? I CAN'T EVEN TELL. o.o

Current Mood: amused

My friend has been fostering a greyhound at her house for the last week. He is a 3ish year old brindle named Spike. I loves him dearly and REALLY wish I had the housing to keep him.

But! She can't take him with her when she goes out of town for thanksgiving. (She has two dogs of her own) This means that Spike needed someplace to go. Mama and Tony are less than thrilled about having 6 animals in the house, (our 2 dogs and cat, my cousin's two cats, and Spike) but are being very understanding and letting me bring him home. Even if mother keeps both teasing me and a)telling me that I can't keep him, and b) calling him 'my new boyfriend' as I keep gushing about how sweet and wonderful a dog he is.

::sigh:: I know it will be harder after he gets a home, but at least this week I can pretend he is mine.

Current Mood: cheerful

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KIT!!!!!!!!!

I hope it was awesome madcrazy fun, and that you got out of that elevator. >.>

Current Mood: bouncy

So.... I own a car now!

To-san actually bought it the DAY I ranted about needing a car. It's a sandy/gold '95 Buick Park Avenue. It has lots of buttons.

The important parts are that it has a really big trunk, and the engine runs very nicely.

In other news: I also got to visit my brother and my bitty!niece! Rosie is doing well, still, though they put her back on the ventilator for the moment, to give her a chance to rest her lungs and focus on growing.

All in all, this was a good weekend. the only (minor) downer was that I got a sunburn spending all day outside with my parents on sunday, and it gave me a slight fever this morning. But! I'm feeling better, and have spent much of the day being useless and in bed, re-(re)reading Brethren. I was a good girl, though, and did my manatee-ing *after* I came back from class.

Current Mood: chipper

ok. so this "have a job 15 mins drive away, but no car" thing has got to STOP.

I can't go to work, because I can't GET THERE. all my co-workers are MIA. or at least their cell phones are. I can't get an answer at the barn, so I don't know if THEY even know I can't get there. The one person the MIGHT have been able to offer me a ride.... called during class, and turned her phone off when my class ended.

I HATE being this helpless and trapped. I am SO ready to have a car RIGHT NOW.

(The only way I can get a ride at the moment, is to possibly borrow my old roommate's Rust Bucket. Seriously. That car is scary, and I'm not sure I want to risk dying when the breaks give out, and I'm not sure how to fix them.)

EDIT: my boss is an amazing person, and some of her riding lessons got canceled, so she had time to pick me up. I know it was in her best interests, but it was still really nice of her.^_^

I still need a car, though.

Current Mood: annoyed
Current Location: stuck on campus

So, I just got a call from Mother. She went and visited baby Rosie at the hospital yesterday.

As I said in my earlier post, my niece, Rosalie Margaret was born 4 months early on friday. She is 2 lbs. The good news is that she made it past the 48 hour mark with flying colors. The doctors took her off the automatic ventilator, and she's breathing on her own with an oxygen tube. They also managed to get a feeding tube into her bellybutton, so she's getting her nutrients the normal way. (her digestive system hasn't finished growing yet) She also has so much hair, my brother joked that they would have had to braid it if she had gone full term. If she keeps doing well, they will be able to take her out of her incubator box and let my sister-in-law hold her. This is EXCELLENT news, as I learned in my Early Child Special Ed class that skin-to-skin contact is REALLY important for the development of healthy pre-mature babies.

My brother and sister-in-law are doing well. They are both grateful of the many miracles that were needed for her to be doing as well as she is. As we all are.

The only concern at the moment is for cerebral hemorrhaging. (eek!) This is a standard worry for all premies, and is most dangerous in the first seven days. After her 1-week mark, she'll be facing a whole new set of worries. But! considering how well she is doing on all other fronts, I'm choosing to remain hopeful.

Current Mood: hopeful

The good: visited family, cuddled with my cat, hung out with friends, got my birthday present from Ariel, bought Ariel's birthday present, my computer survived.

The bad: I was stuck watching stupid high school drama, when Ambie and I planned to watch Heros, realized that when I set my computer in my back pack, I set it ON a banana I forgot was in my bag, possibly ruined my disc drive, as it was full of banana. the rest of the computer seems unaffected. My computer now smells like banana.

The too much to feel one way about: My niece was born yesterday. REALLY premature. as in, almost 4 months early. She seems to be doing alright, but being in special ed, I kinda know she's going to have health problems relating back to this for the rest of her life. She's only 2 lbs. Her name is Rosalie Margaret. Please pray that she has a long and healthy life.

Current Mood: worried

I got Firefly in the mail today! ::sqwees:: I was just wanting to watch it last night, too!

Thank you, Kit! (though your ...wrapping... was evil. doesn't mean I wasn't grinning the whole time, but it *was* evil)

Current Mood: cheerful

So, I sort of got two part time jobs yesterday and today!

Mon, Tues, and Thurs, I will be working for a couple hours a night, feeding/ bringing in horses at the barn where I volunteer. Like the barn owner said, it doesn't pay much, but it's "good for gas and a little bit of spending cash". (or in exchange for riding lessons? >.>)

My other job that I got this afternoon is as an english conversation partner, for a Korean grad student working in the special ed department. She has an interview with her supervisor in november, and is hoping to improve her fluency before then. (and... she really needs help with fluency) Two hours a week, chatting. She offered to pay me (don't know how much, don't really care. I would be willing to do it for free, but I won't turn down some cash) then she made me blush by saying she wants to learn from me because she liked my voice and my pronunciation. ^_^

In other news, my practicum is going much better. I noticed something important about one of the student's reading skills, and my teacher didn't. When I mentioned it to her, she was really happy with me! She also said she wants my input on a writing sample from the same student. Talking! Communication! She has also started giving me more to do in the classroom. I think she genuinely cares about her students, and wants to see them succeed. But in a lot of cases, she's sort of stuck in a rut, as far as teaching methods are concerned. When given more information, she's really willing to work with me. It's a relief. I was starting to get very frustrated with her, but now I'm a lot happier in the room.

Oh! I might also have a car soonish! Mama and To-san will probably buy it long before it gets to me, but that's ok. I really only need it before my student teaching. The car their friends are offering to sell us fits all my parameters: decent looking, small enough it's not going to be a huge gas hog, but still with a big trunk (for moving, as I do it a lot)

In general, this has been a very good week for me.

Current Mood: chipper

My Edward is back! *WITH* a 20GB upgrade on the hard drive AND all my old files! He's faster! And not dying! AND I DIDN"T LOSE ANYTHING! ::flails with happiness::

see, I had prepped myself for a total wipe of everything. this is a VERY happy surprise.

Also: I worked with a small group of kids in my class, and they REALLY UNDERSTOOD what I taught! the teacher *asked* to keep my lesson plan!

::sigh:: today is a good day.

Current Mood: thrilled
Current Location: Anywhere! cause my lappy's back!

So I had my annual birthday renfest bash this weekend, and it was awesome. It was slightly less birthday than previous years, since my birthday doesn't fall during the weekend this year. We had camp cake, but it seems presents are waiting until Big Family Birthday (4 of the women in my family have early september birthdays, so we always get together and celebrate them all at once).

Other than the festival, it was a very quiet, lazy weekend. (dispite the fact that I never DID manage to sleep in past 9:30) We splashed in the lake, and canoed a little, but mostly just lay on the grass, reading and coloring. (I got a coloring book on pre-modern Japanese fashions. it's really cool.)

In fact, I did the most walking this weekend (outside of the Faire) after I got back to muncie. I dropped my car off at a friend's house, but she wasn't there, so I had to walk back to campus.

Current Mood: calm

This has been a busy last few weeks, what with finishing up working at the daycare, moving back to Muncie, fixing my schedule (still working on that), starting to work in a middle school for my final practicum... and taking Edward to the compy-hospital.

>.> It seems that "Hard drive grinding" is not a happy thing.

But... roommate seems cool, I'm on the 21 and over floor, and I have access to a computer lab. Life is pretty good at the moment.

I'm definately looking forward to Festing for my birthday this weekend, though Kit will again (as always) be greatly missed.

Current Mood: content
Current Location: computer lab

So... today was an amazing day!

I had Mama's class today, and they were great and obedient and helpful. I got off work about 20 mins early and went straight to the hospital. got there 6ish, and at 7:12, Miles Christopher was born! He's big for a newborn, and at 8lbs 15oz, he didn't even look all wrinkly faced, instead he was blond and apparently unusually healthy.

Tomorrow I get the pre-schoolers again (mama will have to fight me to get them back), and I will see both sister and baby soon!

Current Mood: bouncy

Tagged by Kit

( 20 question meme )

Not dead, though you might ask me the same question next week.

I'm done with class and, after making not-so-subtle hints to mother that a source of income would be nice, while I was home, it was arranged that I would take over her class when she took a couple weeks off to help take care of my sister's new baby (when it's born). I was going to go on Tuesdays and help out, just so the kids could get used to seeing me, and I could learn the routine.

...That plan lasted until about noon on Tuesday. Boss-lady asks me to "help out the teacher in the school age room". Next thing I know, I'm alone and it's been decided that I should be the lead teacher in that room for the rest of the summer. (they start back in school about the same time I do)

sounds good, right? great for resumes, lots of teaching experience, practically like an early student teaching...without the student part. Thing is, these kids have been doing NOTHING all summer long, but free play, break toys, and get in trouble. Some of them have SERIOUS attitude problems, (yelling at me and calling me a liar to my face, because of something stupid like how many crackers I have in my hand)

I'm there 2 1/2 days (got horribly ill on thursday) and I'm told that I have accomplished more things activity-wise than they have all summer. O.o;

I just hope I can keep up my momentum. I work 8:30- 4:30, but my ride works *6:30*- 3:30. ::shudders:: I sleep in the car for a couple hours, but 6am is still a wretched time to be awake, ever.